MALE COMMON ROOM. Locked and Pissed.
Thought monkeys only lived on the grounds of KYUEM? Think again.
Notice on Male Common Room, locked and shuttered: "This common room will be locked till 5 February coz SOMEONE URINATED ON THE CARPET!" (Spelling is correct.)
The specifics; A student urinated on the COMMON ROOM floor, time and date unknown as, presumably, no one was witnessing that grotesque incident. Word has it the action was a protest against the new Male warden, poor Mr Buhkari. (Note that is NOT Veritas's view, we are just reporting what we have trawled up in our research.)
Students who chanced upon the common room floor, urine-tainted, before the unceremonial locking of the doors, had this to say: Hizami (names have been changed to protect privacy) "I sensed a faint tinge of urine on the carpet." Further enquiries revealed he had also heard other students making the same comment. O, if only they had known the nasty truth.
Bad news for the students is, the Common Room (for readers who have long departed KMYS/KYUEM) is where students watch TV, study on a real carpet, and - get DRINKING WATER. Filtered. It is common knowledge the tap water tastes funnily acidic. Hence the college installed a water filter for students who were averse to the local tap water. With one fell swoop, it is estimated 40% of male KYUEMers have been deprived of drinking water to their liking.
Verdict: IF you have a problem, PISS on the problem. Don't PISS on college facilities. (Metaphorically, of course.) It is an act of cowardice for that one person to endanger everyone else's drinking water supply just because he has a bone to pick. We are, in an oft repeated cliche, the creme de la creme of the country, and it is totally unbecoming that we still treat our First World facilities with a Third World mentality.
Rumour has it the room may only be opened when someone owns up. For the insouciant individual who has brought our entertainment and drinking (water, not beer) to a standstill, this is your last chance to show there's some manly courage deep within.
posted by Nicholas Pang at 1:55 AM
3 Comments:
Now, now, nickypang. There is no concrete evidence that a STUDENT urinated on the carpet. Yes, it is true the carpet smells of urine. But is it neccesarily a urine from a human prostate?
Note that the only people who were said to have personally inspected the stain (and stench) were Mr. Hamdan, the Warden himself and Abg Zul. Has a STUDENT inspected the stain and suggested its origin?
Note again that these Three Urine Experts suggested that the liquid was deposited about 12 midnight. Some students have come forward claiming that they have sensed the bodily fluid wafting since 5 pm that evening.
Thirdly, other animals have been known to urinate in chalets and common rooms. I for one have had the misfortune of waking up to witness a cat marking its territory on my cupboard. This really happened. Just ask Fez.
A fourth and final note would be that the Management have been trying to clamp down on students watching the television past midnight as this might cause them to (*shudder*) oversleep and miss classes the next day. They did not have a concrete reason to do so.(read: good enough to convince Hizami). Until now.
The urine aside, does one smell foul play?
4:53 PM
i do hazwan!! i smell it all over the new warden!
6:37 AM
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12:27 AM
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